Got Roaches?


Come on man.  Of all the latest “super foods” this has to be the one that sends everyone over the edge.  There is no chance that there is ever going to be a “cockroach milk craze.”  Right?  Please tell me I’m right!  Please, don’t go to your nearest health food store and demand they stock “organic cockroach milk” because you’re worried about the hormones in plain old cockroach milk.  If anyone catches themselves doing that, you must look in the mirror and tell yourself it’s all gone too far.

I’m here to gather the information for you and that I will do.  If you find yourself suckling the teat of the creature below, you only have yourself to blame.



Here’s the reason everyone is yammering about “cockroach milk.”  A place called the “International Union of Crystallography” released a study suggesting that crystals containing proteins, fats and sugars which nurture baby cockroaches contain 3 times more “energy” than cow’s milk.

What is crystallography?

“Crystallography is the study of atomic and molecular structure. Crystallographers want to know how the atoms in a material are arranged in order to understand the relationship between atomic structure and properties of these materials. They work in many disciplines, including chemistry, geology, biology, materials science, metallurgy and physics. Crystallographers study diverse substances, from living cells to superconductors, from protein molecules to ceramics. “(source)

So these Crystal lovers have found a way to make themselves feel relevant by hinting at some unknown food energy crisis.

Now, whoever in the world thought that they just don’t get enough “energy” from cow’s milk?  From what I’ve read, the world is facing an obesity epidemic.

What is obesity? Here’s the Mayo Clinic’s definition: “Obesity is a complex disorder involving an excessive amount of body fat.”  People gain body fat when they have “an imbalance in the energy equation. You gain weight when you eat more calories than you burn — or burn fewer calories than you eat.”

So why on earth would the world need to harvest high energy cockroach milk when a major percentage of the world’s population is walking around with an abundance of energy around their midsection?  In fact, there are whole industries created to find ways to EXPEND all the energy we gain from the foods we eat.

Please don’t blindly follow this one.  Clearly the “Crystallographers” were having a budget crisis and they needed a splashy study to draw attention and gain some funding.  Cockroach milk is not a thing and it never will be.

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